Sunday, September 22, 2013

#7 - Ai shite iru koto wo wasurenaide ite

Of course I was hurt the whole time
I just didn't say anything.

"go after her.
don't ever let her go. when she tries to walk away from you, grab her. hug her like no one else could, make her feel secure in your arms. when you miss her, text her. start the conversation to let her know that you want to talk to her. show your love for her unconditionally. don't let anyone else have her. there's no other girl out there just like her, she's special. chase her."

Roses are red, violets are blue. Sugar is sweet and so are you.
But the roses are withering, violets are dead. The sugar bowl's empty and so is your head.

Because even though it hurts so badly, I'll still love you. I know what we are, and what we're not. I'll tell you my friends how wonderful you are. Do I have a dysfunctional mind? I'm so used to the sadness that I'm beginning to believe that I'm addicted to it. I hate to pretend that I'm mentally stable but I can't stop. People tell me to be contented with what I have because I'm lucky. Lucky that I even have a roof above my head. But they don't know how I'm feeling because they're not me.
I've created this lying smile and everybody believes it. I mean I'm not sad. I'm also not exactly happy either. I can laugh and smile and joke around when people are around me. But once I'm alone, I forgot how it feels to have that curve my lips create. It's like impossible to have a day without one bad feeling. And you don't know how pathetic it makes me feel. "How can you judge what you don't understand?"

Isn't it ironic? That the things we do to feel alive, are the things that can kill us?
Why am I dying to live, if I'm just living to die?

"i was looking in the mirror tonight.....
i swear, i've never seen someone whose eyes were so full of pain."


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